5 day Challenge - Day 4
Today is a big day – today you will learn a secret that has the potential to significantly change how you view yourself, AND how to be more satisfied, even during failure. I call this secret:
Change your labels; change your life.
I learned this secret several years ago at a personal development event, and it has altered my view on many things in my life and kick-started a huge momentum of growth, confidence and feeling amazing much more often that I used to.
Could you use some of that in your life too?
Ok so turn off that ringer for just 9 minutes and really absorb today’s Challenge.
When we have an experience, and it gets stored in our memory banks as empowering, then anytime we think about that event, strong, self-sufficient feelings fly back to us.
For example, you may remember being on a sports team in high school or college. The overall memory for you is dependent on your experience and how you labeled it in the moment.
Think of a student who focused on improving their performance and the camaraderie of being on a team. When they think of athletics, their memories are labeled with words like “overcome”, “team” and “great experience”. This brings “I can do this” feelings to their present body and they are primed to take on challenges that they associate with athletics, fitness or being on a team.
Alternately, a second student tended to be a perfectionist and focused on how they didn’t learn the sport as quickly as they would have liked. In the moment, driving away from practice, they may have put the label of “frustrating”, or “embarrassing” on their experience. Now when they are faced with a new workout or athletic opportunity, they tend to feel frustrated and afraid of looking bad, because that’s the label their mind associates with that past experience.
Why is this important?
Because every experience you go through has two sides; the obvious challenge and the hidden truth.
If you notice and focus on the challenge, then you are missing out on the hidden truths that are there for the taking.
This is more than “looking at the bright side” or “looking for the silver lining”.
I love the thought of a label because I think of it like a jelly jar.
The experience is IN the jelly jar.
The label is how you describe it (and categorize it when you’re not in the midst of it anymore).
The experience has all the facets and fluidity of life.
What you choose to learn from it and then how you label it has the potential to significantly change it’s impact in your present day and in the future.
Many times we slap a label on ourselves instead of consciously evaluating it it’s really true.
For example, you might blurt out something at a meeting and it’s not well thought through.
Internally you might hear “you’re such a mess. You must have looked so stupid in there.”
That self talk is a fabrication, remember?
So if a mess-up = failure to you (your label), then every time you come short, you will feel like a failure, which feels embarrassing, can make you feel worthless and hopeless.
No one signs up for that!
Seeing your mistake as an opportunity to grow allows you to be more satisfied with yourself and your performance day to day, because you stop expecting perfection and instead realize that growth is your goal. Moving the needle just a bit at a time allows you to feel like more of a success, which makes you feel happier and more satisfied.
Changing the meaning of the supposed “failure” is a huge untapped powerhouse!!
Instead of: Instead of I’m so disorganized. I’ll never get anything done.
Could you label it: I’m developing a skill, and every time I practice it, it’s helping me grow into the person I want to be.
Instead of: I can’t do this right, I’m so weak.
Could you label it: This is just a ‘season’ and I’m learning something new. Every time I practice this for 10 minutes, my skills and strengths are growing.
I ask you, when you mess up, or aren’t measuring up to your inner standards, what words are you slapping on yourself as a label?
How can you find a hidden truth INSTEAD, and shine a light on it?
1. Think of at least one time this week when you gave an experience a label and think of a more empowering one you could use instead. Write this down in your 5 Day Challenge Journal.
2. Come on over to the Facebook group and share. What label are you changing today, and how does your new label make you feel?
I can’t wait to hear! Tomorrow we’ll be tying all this together.
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